i hope your v-card owns a pair of floaties
Yes. It's so easy to pack to leave when you've thrown away half your clothing cause it smells like vomit.
he was so high that he wouldn't speak to anybody for like 30 minutes, he'd only gobble, like a turkey.
The online application for Mcdonald's said I could do incredible things there. Today I threw out shit filled underwear in the women's restroom and escorted a very drunk/high 42 year old man outside after he ordered a 5 dollar foot long and a bloody mary.
there's a sledge hammer in the bottom of the swimming pool... so whatever happened last night was probably awesome
i really regret not blowing your cousin before he went to jail
I think my multiple attempts of taking his life, no matter how unintentional they were, has put a damper on our friendship
I think I'm gonna quit partying for awhile. Piercing my own nose is where I draw the line.
Boats looked like robot pelicans and time was slow and now im on wipe out
We're you guys there last night when everyone started chanting "Nacho Steph"? Someone picked me up, carried me to the nacho cheese and made me do a nacho cheese stand.
In the last 3 months, I've slept with an ex,someone single, someone in a relationship, someone married, and someone divorced. I should get some type of grown up girl scouts badge.
He hasn't texted me back since last week when we sexted. I think telling him I wanted to choke him with chains was a bit much for our first time.
She asked how comfortable I was with her while we were in the shower. She then proceeded to pee in said shower.
Thank you, BTW, for defiling my bed. Glad it was done well.
This night could easily degenerate into a drunken haze of strippers and gambling, but I need a support network.
Randomize
