she texted him the burrito order while she was puking in the Del Taco parking lot...
But then he started to talk about his wedding he wants and I quote " and yes parts will be choreographed"
Dude before you bang that chick preheat the oven to 425 I wanna make a pizza for afties
we were totes just talking about. huu in the bathbub. 5 girlszzz
Please make the clown in the corner stop judging me. I mean he's the one with paint on his face. I don't need him judge judying me.
we played dirty jenga the drinking edition... some girl really just broke a rib? how do we even go this hard
I just remember being happy that I got that toilet fixed so I had somewhere close to throw up
It was his first time doing shrooms and we made him ride in the truck bed. But he kept standing up and yelling when we stopped so we had to keep driving
Is eating fries while lying on the floor bad for you?
If I choke and die at least I will have been doing something I love
Code 10 We gotta leave. Now. I took a dump in the upstairs toilet and its clogged and overflowing, and believe me I don't want to have to explain myself to this frat on parents weekend.
So my quick shower turned into a "lay in the shower and let the hot water reign over you because you are too hungover to wash your hair" shower. I'll be there closer to 1:30!
My coworker's brand new computer showed up today. He's on vacation for the next week. Brian and I are installing Windows 98 on it.
The logic in me says "don't text him" .But the vagina in me says "text him".
i could have got laid, but instead, i threw up in her hair. you can cross that off the bucket list.
I never thought I'd be complaining about having sex 4 times a day, but here we are...
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