fighting downstairs. join me tonight to hear their makeup sex. also, let's make skittles vodka.
Breakfast of vicodin and eggs out of a solo cup at about three in the afternoon on a wednesday...I have my life together
then for some reason i googled "how much to buy a cannon"
I'm pretty sure the new "vibrating mascara" is just a disguised dildo for those of us who are too ashamed to purchase a real one.
Well, at least their eye lashes will look good while they masturbate shamefully.
just throwing this out there: period starts tomorrow sooo either sex tonight or not until tues/weds.
i get a bj anyways so it's really your choice.
k i'll be over in 5.
Just fucked my roommate on the first night of our 12 month lease. 2010 will be awkward.
I feel like none of my dresses scream slut the way I'd like them to
so apparently the car got towed with me passed out in the back seat.
Worst night here by far. And ive slipped in my own piss so thats saying something
Definitely almost got hit in the face with a baby
He was singing Justin Beiber while we did it. I love secure Spanish men
it says 'tasty bitch' in sharpie on my tits...
The girl who comes up after me always strips to Lana Del Rey. I didn't think working in a strip club could be any more depressing.
He made me watch a sex tape him and his gf made. They were in the shower when her roommate walked in on them. Not kidding: she asked to join in.
I hate him. He gets laid, my dick gets laughed at.
We just did a u turn on the highway to settle a dispute in a game of slug bug
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