My professor really needs to stop abbreviating. I'll never remember what "Fun. Anal. Trade-offs?" means when i study.
so after six weeks of dating she admitted shes bi and asked if it would freak me out if we brought another girl into the bedroom. i said no in this hesitant voice and she said 'if you let me dont worry ill make it up to you'
i literally fucking hate you so fucking much.
I slept with him to see his dog one last time
He made a fake guest pass that was just a note card with "I'm here. Me." written in sharpie, and tried to convince the security guard it was real.
I'm not leaving bed today. And i guess my drunken ass last night hit my roommate in the face with a tiki torch then proceeded to cry while carrying around a picture of he who must not being name. I'm a piece of work.
He was uncircumcised
It was like inception. A penis within a penis within a penis
he went at my nipples like a starved dog.
You tried to pay for our cab with the 2 dollars you got from selling your natty ice outside the strip club.
a pizza costume came into my possession last night. needless to say i showed up to his house wearing only the pizza, shouting "delivery" into his window.
i woke up in just my socks. my clothes were outside, he had rugburn on his elbows, and a window was broken.
He came on my pillow pet. That's unacceptable. I hate boys.
Not a or good or bad impression, just that you were all basically naked playing beer bong in sombreros and ties. Casual.
Halfway through the night I was hiding in a trashcan. Then I "sobered" up and ran around the house throwing change because I wanted to make my last moments of 2013 charitable.
It's really hard to masturbate now that I live with girls who actually function before 11 am.
I'm seeing how far I can grow my leg hair out before Jason will say anything. I'm up to an inch
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