My ass is singing 4 different tunes right about now... Taco Bell was a bad idea!
also, you're talking to the girl for whom "deformed baby arm" wasn't quite a dealbreaker.
i feel like barbie the morning after an elton john party
She just told me she blew the waiter in the bathroom. Should I still leave a tip?
I'm pregaming for my hair cut. Working two jobs definately taught me how to use my time wisely...
This better be legit desert and not your penis alamode
Going to the market. I need some nachos and a serious re-evalution of my life.
We knew it was a good time to leave when you spilt the salsa on the ground and were trying to put it back in the jar with your hands
Shouldn't have fucked on the top bunk, I bounced so high my hair got caught in the ceiling fan and almost broke my neck.
You and the dog were competed for the water dish
She was giving me head while we were in my tree house, my mom then came out to let the dog out so she stopped so I would stop groaning, was it good? You tell me
Just took plan b with my eggs and chai...homecoming got the best of me already
I'm about to do something based solely on the fact that a fortune cookie told me to. This may not end well.
I seriously just had to blow dry my thong.
I went to a swingers party and came home with a boyfriend. I love my life.
Randomize
