community service is like the breakfast club... except we're all the criminal.
Court Ordered Rehab!!! Do you think I'll need a swimsuit?
Remember when we were trying to guess how many people could fit in my shower? The answer is 7
Got a basket, 50 condoms, some candy, 100 plastic eggs & my bunny costume. Campus will feel my wrath in 2 weeks
Kinda wish I banged him. I need the exercise.
i woke up with my wallet keys and phone missing and a treasure map to find them stapled to my shirt.
haha i know
Nahh. Maybe not even a handful. It's more like a heaping teaspoon worth of dick.
I miss eating meals at a table and having unprotected sex..
Drinking games this Saturday as usual although the ice cube tray game is banned due to last weeks incident
K, so let's go ahead and say that mcnugget and margarita Tuesday was a bad idea
We were running down las vegas boulevard at 8:30 am with our beers cause we were late for our flight
Just smoked pot with a guy who has apparently been living in the woods for over a month. He just walked out of the woods. This is not real life.
OH AND DAN PET MY CAT WHILE I WAS GIVING HIM HEAD
she started chasing me through the forest like a horny serial killer
i woke up wearing a life jacket, holding on to a footlong hotdog, and had on a mr. hustle 1995 shirt on
good night
Randomize