For some reason, Oliver from Hannah Montana reminds me of pudding.
That's cute.
'in an unhealthy relationship' should def be an fb option
come over. we are watching hoarders and playing i spy.
Somehow I managed to make my Dunkin Donuts uniform look slutty. And I'm not even wearing hoops.
she actually told me to ignore the cokeheads in the corner with knives.
cum and cheesecake for breakfast...don't fucking tell me pride week isn't awesome
I need you to stand in the corner and ref this threesome. Wear stripes.
Aparently i was the only guy at her parents bbq throwing up in the pool so Im the asshole right...
She was touching herself and looking a shoes online. My debt is bad enough without bringing that hot mess into my life.
Do you miss the park or do you miss us having sex in public?
I want to eat a stick of butter
Did your pain meds kick in?
It tastes nice
I don't remember what you did, but I DO remember that i'm supposed to hate you for it.
With my son watching me, I pulled down my pants and shit in her trash can.
Since when do my one night stands start sending you friend requests?
I felt like I crashed a wedding. Everyone was dressed so nice and I was covered in actual dirt and a little blood.
Randomize
