This morning when you woke up you looked like one of the Wii Bowling people. I think it was the eyebrows combined with the sambuca
Apparently Chef Boyardee is the only guy I'm taking home tonight.
tonight is proof that a xbox 360 will always be more reliable than a girl ever will
and a girl gets the red ring of death every month
There's a girl in my class named "La-a" pronouced "Luh Dash uh" I hate everyone
I am soup sandwich. I have been at dAnce party
We're gonna have screwdrivers in a cab at 4am?
Is that weird?
Hey, remember when Hot Stuff played in the back of the ambulance? Or no, cause of your concussion...
I just soaked a sugar cookie in nail polish remover to clean off my nails because I was too lazy to walk to the bathroom to get a cotton ball. Is this what rock bottom feels like?
Fuck you asshole. You cost me cheerleader pussy.
I think I passed out drunk at my own jewelry party
How am I supposed to buy weed and pancake mix when it's raining?
I wanna trust fall face first on a penis.
I screamed "You look like a guy I've fucked!" to your brother at a party... I have some explaining to do.
I made out with that lesbian chick for a blunt. NO REGRETS.
You made the lady who made your cheeseburger sign the box so that when she got famous you would have her autograph.
Randomize
