so are u like ashamed lol?
not really. i dont look at it as being homeless. im just going to pretend im on an extended camping trip
you convinced the bartender to un-cut you off by letting him touch your boobs whenever you ordered a drink.
So when I got her home I realized being a lesbian again isn't like riding a bike...
in light of our recent drunken behavior, i think it's time we seriously consider hiring ourselves a babysitter.
She alternated between blowing me and feeding me bites of the sandwich she made for me.
she walked out and i tried to get her to come back but i couldn't remember her name so i just whistled... future reference: that doesn't work
And then I passed out in my towel and was woken up by my roommate introducing me to her trick for the night.
You have to wear the princess leia gold bikini every Sunday
I'd rather make snow angels in a pool of elephant shit.than sleep with him.
So I think before Superbowl weekend begins we should all take a look back on last year and learn from our pitfalls... AKA no touchdown shots and kitchen crying.
I think we should take up crocheing or stamp collecting....something completely lacking penises
I may have played more drinking games with my family this last week than all of freshman year...
Would it be rude to use my vibrator? like he forfeited his right to be mad when he left me orgasmless...right?
I didn't want dick. I wanted spaghetti.
Are you okay? You're not sitting at home on facebook. I'm worried about you.
Randomize
