what do you have against ST
DO NOT ABBREVIATE LIKE YOU AND STAR TREK ARE FRIENDS.
Hey, remember that girl at rocklobster you thought was hot but were to pussy to talk to? You were right, her boobs are fake and she gives the best head on the planet. Can you come pick me up?
You're dead to me.
Dude, I don't care how big her tits are. I have to dump her. She shit in my shower.
The sweet smell of jungle juice and bad decisions is calling our name.
Company party. Just told vp "you look like a cat person"
He told me he's not in to anal. I need to marry him, ASAP.
Shared a jello shot with her mom last night. then she tucked me in and took of my shoes for me
You stuck your entire fist into a full jar of peanut butter and starting assaulting people
Dad and I are shitfaced screaming at Canadians in Walmart. Life is good.
You had one beer and one beer can full of vodka and you took a huge gulp of one of them and called it Emily Roulette
She seriously spent 30 minutes trying to make balloon animals out of my limp dick...
...
Exactly.
He was making Jim beam nachos. Chips soaked in whiskey with cheese
Let's stay in this weekend and play drinking games to the Winter Olympics.
As long as we can drink anytime we see a stray dog, mafia looking Russian or double toilet.
Somehow my boobs came up in conversation AGAIN last night and I'm still not getting laid...
Stereotypically, lax bros last the longest, but have huge egos that are annoying. Baseball players barely last 10mins, but are really nice. And than we have soccer players, last long and have no egos. Me and my friends have collected our findings.
Randomize
