I just ate a cockroach and I want to be a fire truck.
umm..so Dad's wearing a thong, I don't know what to do
put a dollar in it?
I don't understand why we need a holiday to become more aware of boobs...
I feel violated. a guy just did an ultrasound on my balls. He made eye contact..
he like comes into my room and is like..."can you fix my pants" and then just drops trou
i just made a "things you cannot forget to do this week just because you're high" list.
you handed me your bra at the bar and said 'hold my purse'
He was going down on me and raised up for a minute, slipped and punched me in the face. My lady boner left immediately.
Maybe it's the vicodin, but all I wanna do is hunt wild hogs.
Who are these men, what are we doing here, how is this helping us toward our goals of sex and pasta? Things to consider.
Where's Taylor bro?
Never mind found him under the sink
Went to 7-11 to buy condoms with the $20 I found on the ground outside Rite Aid. A good day for drug stores
Ur betting me $100 that I can't do ur sister?
Don’t fucking talk to that dude from monday!! Ethical consumption dude, don’t fuck shitty guys
he had to stop me from eating snow off the street on the way back to pick up our cars. that's how hungover i am.
Randomize
