this is amy. the small petlike person from the womens bathroom at the reef.
It is obvious to me now why clam chowder & beer aren't a good combo.
If there was a creeper hall of fame you and me would be the first two inductees
why did u have a candy cane hung on your dick in the first place?
she has a santa fetish
cute.
She just dipped a dollar bill in her queso dip and almost ate it before I slapped it out of her hand, no more bar crawls..
Guy next to me at the plasma center is high and watching porn on his itouch. I am wayy to hung over for this level of poor.
Only in this snowstorm did have I realized the lengths I'll go to to get laid.
does it count as a threesome if she tried to blow the dude who was passed out next to us?
She kept looking at me and saying "you are the scary high".
I'm at the bar alone. Is this how you feel?
It is becoming increasingly more likely that my entire halloween costume will be entirely composed of borrowed clothing from the two girls I'm hooking up
I just rolled over in bed and felt a bump. Turns out it was a lil nug. Talk about being princess and the weed.
Lesson learned:nothing good comes from an at home wax kit.
We were right in the middle of sex and all of a sudden his kids toy story action figure starts talking "I think the word your searching for is Space Ranger." A literal Buzz kill. It was equally creepy and hilarious.
You shouted “im bobby labonte!” In the process of shoutgunning a beer. He said you were too redneck for him...
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