i just made a list of the people i have slept with. is it bad that some of them are just either names of the places i met them or the color of the shirts?
i also rounded the number up for good measure. i am sure there are a few i have forgotten about.
is it bad that the first thing i do when i get downstairs is go on farm town?
I think I'm maturing; i was gonna watch porn and then take a nap but i motivated myself to put my laundry in first.
i guess i finally out drove tiger woods this morning..
Just had a dream about an abnormally large bottle of tequila. No more depressed drinking for me.
She sent me a pic of shot glasses on fire if that tells you anything
Dude she was 62...with a boob job. And I'm proud to say I made out with that.
You may have graduated college on time, but my 6th year ass gets to see awesome tits every day just for showing up.
I think I broke a hole in her wall trying to do backflips
I thought this guy walking back to the dorms with his black laundry bag was walking a black flamingo I'm not even kidding I had to take a break on a bench after that.
You're my favorite person
HIS BALLS ARE HEAVEN SENT FROM THE VELVET ANGLES.
After we hooked up he started to cry and called his mom and told her he wanted to marry me
Weddings might be fun but they are not getting fucked in the wilderness fun.
At one point in the night, as we were running from the cops, I clearly remember you yelling "little gnomes are tickling the insides of my body!" ...that high.
He stopped eating me out to remind me to look at the stars
Randomize