he just referred to himself as the billy mays of his frat.. heres how to order
sometimes i wonder what i would do without sheltered catholic girls w/ overprotective parents
never have sex?
Come home. Power Hour by yourself is only fun for the first 10 minutes.
we were so high we made up an elaborate backstory because we were paranoid about going into the wig shop w/o being serious wig shoppers
two words: fractured penis. two more: emergency room.
We did face masks and fucked...he really isn't gay, what they say about europeans is just true
pretty sure i saw you masturbating on chatroulette a minute ago. yes, i can recognize your cock
I THOUGHT I SAW YOU
She made me go down the fire escape when her mom came for breakfast.
Thank God I did Vegas bombs with those cops at their Christmas party. We should so be in jail.
Ice cream: Good. Fraternity: Good. Eating ice cream off a Skid Row bum's ass crack in order to get into a Fraternity: Homoerotic at best. I quit.
I sent you a snap of me in the bath, and you sent me a snap of a taco. An actual taco.
I was going to learn how to knit but I got high instead.
also. got fucked to usher last night. dunno if thats a new high or a new low
Was it at least a good usher song?
I forgot what I was gonna say, but I'm pretty excited to not be pregnant.
you are the root of all my greats nights and my worsts decisions
Randomize
