we talked about european history as he fucked me from behind in the shower... i think it was a success
I'm not sure where but someone shit somewhere in the house
It's hard to be above the influence when you are the influence.
i have wind burn on my face from my head hanging out the window of the cab vomitting
the only reason i invite her is so when the guys start to hit on her i know it's time to take their keys
That doesn't help it make any more sense. Because now you've brought pinata condoms into this.
I'd rate him "doable" on a scale from "ew, run" to "you should've already fucked him".
That's about an "8" on normal scales.
I was in the freezer we were knocking over shit. Speaking of which i asked my boss. I can hook up with girls in the freezer
Yeah just sayin. Whenever you want to come over and wank me off you can
I just sang country roads at the top of my lungs with my cab driver. Tonight was a success.
If we can't get laid at a bar crawl, we should just quit life.
I'm not saying you did or didn't sleep with him but he's has your thong hanging from his ceiling fan
If I'm going to risk life and limb to wear a Wings jersey to the Garden next week, the least they can do is win.
And the most would be ending up in bed with one of them.
Well sort of got busted by a cop while having sex outside, so your call
She was trying to be sexy well putting on my condom with her mouth when her cat pounced from the corner of the room witch caused her to gasp and inhale the condom
She then told me, and I quote "I want to send you nudes just to see how you'd react."
Randomize
