That was a long time ago. She needed the money.
Adam has been drinking
Who has his phone
Adam does
you want my honest opinion? I'm sure refering to her vagina as the "bat cave" was your first mistake.
Escorted a stripper to her car last night,and all I got was a "Thanks" and "Go Steelers."
well shes beginning to earn a reputation as "the girl who tries to bone her hook ups in the ass with a pickle"
I also love beards. The playoffs are like christmas for my vagina.
Using our apartments online floor/space planner to see how many beer pong tables we can fit. Dont think they had this in mind when they put this thing online.
Probably not lol but were fitting as many as possible
Something about being drunk at 1pm chasing seagulls on the beach while it's raining is very calming
do you think me going to the gyno dressed as a cat is inappropriate?
You said this was your mistake shot and then vomited on the tv. Never forget.
A unicorn in pinstripe pants just got on the J at Dolores stop. It can only be a good night
Would you paint my ceiling for oral sex?
And you know what the worst part is? Because of him I can now relate to a goddamn Taylor Swift song. FUCK. MY. LIFE.
I was doing good, then they gave me free shots
You stumbled into the hotel room escorted by security and then went into the bathroom sat by the toilet, threw up for hours while slamming your head on the wall and whimpering "why" over and over.. I went to bed
Randomize
