ugh, i have officially sinned in all of my cute clothes. i can't even wear any of them without feeling regret.
it was the least impressive dick i've ever seen... and i've changed babies' diapers.
I'm surprised you like me... I didn't think I was your type.
Blonde hair and big tits is every guys type.
those are the first brownies ive had since i was 13 that didnt have weed in them.
No now hes going to beat me to our goal of getting someone to have sex in the library. I hate periods.
I don't know what to judge you more for.
I can't even teach it... It's just natural slutyness.. My mom has it too
This does no justice to the amount of paint I'm covered in or the amount of balls I'm tripping.
...She was shooting whiskey using a turkey baster...i was horrified.
Almost propositioned sex in exchange for a study guide for my final tomorrow.
Paris has not been good for her. Everytime she has a one night stand from a different country, she buys a mini flag and tapes it to her wall with the others
Seeing your one night stand on campus never gets less awkward. Why is Subway the only good place to eat?
thanks for piggy backing me around for the rest of the night when I got too drunk to stand.
Who the fuck gets injured on a merry-go-round? HOW IS IT POSSIBLE??
Is it customary to send a 'thank you card'to someone who gave you awesome oral as a gift at your housewarming party?
Bug bite on my vagina. I think we need to stop this 'sex in awesome places campaign.'
Randomize
