Plan B is the new Plan A
i was like the pretty and slutty 8th grade girl who goes to a party, gets wasted, and ends up having sex with a senoir
details?
alcohol + bed + penis = sex
My aunt just said- "pizza is like sex. Even if it ain't good it ain't bad." Obviously she doesn't know us too well.
Why the fuck was there a shirtless Mexican in my apartment this morning?
She went to the bathroom before i broke up with her so i changed all 2500 of her songs on her computer to "I'm a cheating whore"
And to think..we used to do everything sober...
well she hit her head and had a concussion. i had to make out with her to keep her awake.
just got in my apt...and theres jungle juice here i left from over a month ago..this could be interesting...or deadly
What if I told you that I had 160 ounces of cheap malt liquor in my backpack? Espn films 40 for 40s presents: Edward 40 hands. Our room. 11PM/10 central
If you come home soon there's a stripper in the shower. Don't be alarmed
We created a neighborhood watchdog drinking game
Sending emails to my new boss whilst unable to move from the toilet seat because of alcohol. Great start to a new job as a school counselor.
My goal is to be drunk before we even get out of the No Wake Zone.
Guess who isn't pregnant with a random sex ocean baby?!?!
I like that you use a Disney movie to describe the starting of our BDSM relationship, lmao
Randomize
