grinding to god bless the USA? really?
shut up
thank god he doesn't hang out with everyone else i've had sex with
well, yeah, he can't fit the whole neighborhood in his apartment
I will give you vagina for bag of have'a corn chips.
I can't wait until next week, when I find out what drunk me added to the Netflix queue.
I could write a book on how to barely get by in community college. I just took an online quiz on my phone, at the bar, 6 minutes before it was due.
If your wondering where your blanket is, I put it on the 2 guys you brought home last night. Their still sleeping outside on the trampoline.
he brought me knee pads...is that sweet or weird?
How do you feel about fucking me quick and then me leaving to go do arts and crafts?
U can find me on my couch hungover eatin tuna evaluating my life
Not a clue. But I did find out that his penis has a British accent.
Dude where are you? I've been here an hour and all I've done is get head from a random in the stairwell.
He turned down head in favor of a handjob. Not sure if he's crazy or i have magic hands
I walked so much yesterday and I was like holy fuck I need to do some cardio apart from sex cause this is ridic
He kept saying "Ayyyyyyy" during foreplay... during sex.... during everything! It felt like I was having sex with friggin Fonzie from Happy Days!
Looking back at our past texts, the minute it turned 2020 you were cleaning your house and I was dying of the cold. We were prophesying the Rona.
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