I wanna put my baby in that!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Ew you even made it your fb status
Ppl probably think ur having a kid
I hope
Love having children with random chicks
She just looked down there and said "i breed horses. this is better than anything ive ever seen."
You probably don't remember this but last night I bought you a lap dance from a stripper that had nipples that looked like runny eggs....you're welcome.
You don't want any of I have. Seriously. Its 80 proof rum that was 8 bucks for a liter. I'm afraid
I'm sure your liver is writing out a will as we speak
Yep. It's going to be us, strippers, and drag queens.
A glittery, gay, heavily makeuped, scantily dressed clusterfuck.
You know it's a good weekend when you wake up on Sunday questioning your sexuality.
I try not to have friends with attractive fathers, it only brings my morals down.
i liked you for your lack of ambition and abundance of weed
I will gladly accept you into my home with open legs.
Whoever decided to put a Denny's that close to the strip club is a genius.
Speaking of, what are you doing next weekend? I'm going to a rope bondage seminar and may need a partner if my date bails.
I also woke up in a bed soaked of pee and drunkenly lectured him on the dangers of chewing tobacco... weird night
There's a dude wearing a banana suit at the house across the street....
Update: tequila girl had her hand down groomsmen pants
well, i found him passed out on a picnic table two miles away with a lit cig in his hand...he had a rough night
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