Going back to my hometown to drink absinthe with highschool boys. Remind me to evaluate this decision tomorrow.
First off: I'm drunk so fuck you. Second: you weren't a bad girlfriend. Tres: thats 3 in spanish. Number 4: fuck 3 Doors Down
Calvin and Hobbes are double-teaming a butterfly. They're in the bathroom, and drawing a crowd.
Vanessa Carlton's songs would be so much better if she was pretty
His drunk text included an attempt at quoting a Nyquil bottle in MLA format
oh my god. separately texting an Allie and an Ally while drunk is hard, and I'm climbed 1/2 way up a bridge pier.
you were leaning up against the wall pulling your shirt up asking girls to dance on you. your courage to do that is both admirable and frightening.
Im playing lifeguard in my own bathroom. How's ur night?
Queso dip and pictures of Daniel's penis. It's like the last days of Rome over here.
The sense of comroderie I've built with my liver over the course of this semester is beautiful
I can't decide if I'm depressed or if this is just what life without a bidet feels like.
My cat licked the coke mirror and now is giving me dirty looks. Bet money she has the drip.
THE STRIPPER HAD A GUN JOHN!
I'm over being sad. I'm now onto thinking about all the ways in which he is a total fuckwaste
I woke up on a park bench with a nice homeless guy waking me up. I bought us Carl's Jr. Best birthday ever!
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