just got my goo swallowed for the first time. colors seem so much more vivid now, and more rainbows are outside
He spent the whole night convincing me I wasn't fat, but after we had sex he said "Oh, I see what you mean"
It's the first day of summer. It's not a race it's a marathon. Pace yourself
You have all been randomly chosen to participate in a new game called: how high was I? If you have any information about this or about where my clothing items went give me a shout. Thanks an good luck.
Even with having the shower running and music on everyone could hear the alcohol gods making me sacrifice my dignity and meals from the past week.
I LOVE YOU SO MUCH I'M ON A WILD DICK CHASE FOR YOU. How many lesbians do YOU know that would do that? HOW MANY????
Just a warning... Flip, sip, or strip always ends in all participants being naked. Learning from experience.
We need to make boob twerking a thing. I feel like that's why vine was invented
I should be done at 8 and I've also done a great Job of convincing my self that I should get really drunk tonight
Here's to not getting arrested this year on thanksgiving again. Cheers bitches!
My glasses were in the garbage this morning
"He didn't answer my snap so I know he's arrested"
We only initially bonded over boobs and sarcasm
Accidentally texted co-worker instead of bf “I’m wfh tomrw. Nooner? 💦”
She really wants to hug you. With her vagina.
Randomize
