I've decided that I only have enough money to either eat or drink over the next month. I'm sure you know what choice I've made.
i mean you're really good at taking the morning after pill...so you could put that on your resume..
yeah, i think fast in a bad sitatuion and am able to react with appropriate measures
his balls ACTUALLY tasted like nuts
i jus got home and totaly forgot i had nut all over the back of my shirt
..im mad u rememberd about that
I just had a boat ride of shame. With Senior Citizens.
chugging beers on the train. people are staring. I would be offended if it wasn't 8:30
He bought my favorite ceral.. I've guess I've earn the status as one of his regular fuck buddies. I feel honored and proud. His roommates girls don't get this treatment.
My day may involve a drug pinata. I LOVE MY LIFE.
I don't remember... but I heard a cop threatened to pepper spay my dick
What was the point of renting a $600 trolley if no one even remembers going to the first bar?
You didn't throw up on me, you threw up on yourself and then tried to give me a hug
you were on a whole other level. you went home with him because he said "you got some light ass eyes"
Apparently I drunkenly told him I was going to ride him to the rodeo and break him like a bronco, then I stole his nachos and beer. Adulting is hard!!!
Just bought shot glasses from the thrift store. I think the guy buying a winter coat was even judging me.
She pooped on me during a reverse cowgirl. And it wasn't a little bit either.
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