Well apparently he's into motor boating.
come over anyways, right now, right this second
it can be a super quick quicky, then you can go back to studying
wow, that sounds SO fun, please stop enticing me with premature ejaculation
How am I suppose to look him in the face when I know a commercial lasts longer than he does?
apparently 20 random guys watched the process of me being carried on a mattress through the dorms
May have caused an international incident. More details after we taxi in.
She rolled over this morning and asked "did you refer to my vagina as splash mountain last night? "
Your "OraGel will numb anything" theory was the worst thing I ever believed in.
well what is some mechanical horse racing with out blow involved
He might have if you were a little more subtle about your feelings instead of telling everyone multiple times how much you wanted his dick
Hangover or death. Death. I'll have a slice of death please.
tell her i changed her phone's unlock password to be the length of my fully erect penis in centimeters. I'll be in my room for the next two hours.
5 minutes Isn't even long enough to bring me even close to an orgasm. How selfish. Think about baseball and fuck me you idiot.
Where are all your bongs? Your Dad wants to make sure they're put away before his family gets here.
Umm....in my room, on my closet, under the bed and behind my laptop.
Your shit was massive.
I'm not 100% sure how to respond to that.
If you were in a "who has the massivest shit contest", you'd win by a landslide.
I collect Covid conspiracy theories like I collect Pokemon.
Randomize