I had a talk with my mom about respecting myself and not acting like a whore so she will rip my nose ring out if she somehow sees that picture
we need to get ahold of those "sexting" teens on tyra. HAWT!
wasnt one 13?
I cannot convey how much I really do love Chris Hansen. FYI: he is the JC Chasez of my adult years.
We stole your phone last night, texted your brother and told him you wanted it up the ass by him. All he said was "I want ur money."
I've gone to the bathroom 3 times. And forgot to pee. 3 times. Let's say we call it a night, I need to be found. I see a fish tank by the bar and some stairs.
There was a suspicious looking plate that suggests I may have eaten salad with gravy
He told me I just kept sending him the word sex and dollar signs.
hung over. covered in somebodies makeup. and ready to drink.
My fake id got more birthday sex than I've had in my life.
That's what tomorrow is for. It's like bloodletting. Except with shame and liquor.
Just made a floating bacon boat for the hot tub. This is what America is all about.
You don't know how much I love you. You could play Careless Whisper while we have sex and I'd still love you
you missed 2am bagpipes and my roommate looking hot as fuck in a kilt
I'm so excited you texted me but I'm way to high to process it
I just want my kids to know I fucked some really hot dudes before their father.
You're going to scar your kids
Randomize
