I'm glad girls dont get visible erections
But, it would have made life so much easier...
My Vagina smells like Nemo again.
Some kid in my class just puked in his backpack, zipped up the backpack, put the backpack on and walked out the door.
He gave me his number and said the usual call whenever you need someone but then was like... or just call me.
You would pick up a guy in AA.
Did I send you an asleep facebook message about the upcoming football season titled 'BRILLIANT' at 4:45 this morning?
It took years to build this empire of casual fuckings and not carings.
I may or may not have hooked up with the cop who arrested me.. Or I can cross hooking up with a stripper in a cop outfit off my bucket list.
Before he left he told me if his girlfriend ever finds out, she'll take us both to an alley and kill us.
I hope. Last year I got lost in New Orleans and some guy named Cookie walked me home while I cried.
Let us rub each other in fish scales and become mermaids
It's only ok to pee out the window in the afternoon when you're drunk.
i knew it was a party when i saw you sitting on the couch naked with the keg in your lap, still drinking and passing out cups
Good Morning! You are sterile right?
Ya i'm marrying the man who can hear/smell this level of flatulence and stick around
Btw I puked in your glovebox
Randomize
