I think I saw a glimmer of recognition, but she must not have been able to make me out through all of her whorishness.
there's only 1 girl at Mount St Mary that's a virgin. the Mary statue standing outside
you kept say ridiculous things then repeating them in perfect classical latin. You are onee intelligent drunk
they're mlb prospects.. of course i'm gonna bang one of them.
you asked the janitor if you could ride his floor cleaner.
He doesn't belong with God. He belongs face-down in a pile of his own excrement, vomit, blood and semen. Then pissed on by Satan.
nothing worse than walking out of class after 3 hours and having covered exactly zero information
walking out with herpes. that would be worse
You screamed "there will be blood" and punched some random guy in the face. So no, we can't go back to that bar.
Passing out is my livers way of protecting my mind.
I woke up snuggling a bottle of water while Hercules played on Netflix. Whiskey Wednesdays
We're lying on the pavement outside of the college. No one has asked if we're okay. I think they all understand.
I have a few Facebook friends I only keep around for quality control purposes on Tinder
I will not abuse the gift that was given to me
You were given a vagina and you abuse that pretty hard
I don't remember anything from last night, but at track I found my thong next to the high jump pit... So it must has been decent
Sober sex is weird like I didn't expect this when I got clean
Randomize
