As a matter of fact my bong is named Hulkamania brother
the new roommate knocked on my door this morning holding a bong in one hand and my dennys leftovers from last night in the other. love this kid. Best student housing placement ever.
you were asking all the dicks on chatroulette if they had daddy issues
I told my dad that bagels were the equilelent of angels kisses and if he bought me one i would do a split
shes the kind of girl that would cock block endangered pandas
If he shows up in a "mount n dew" me shirt im throwing him to the lesbians
Welcome to the difference between being FWBs (remember how we used to see who could get more lap dances a night?) and being in a relationship. Fun, huh?
She told me to pick her up in the corner of shame and self-disgust.
What is soo wrong about a house of half-naked people hugging each other and laughing?
The pinata full of drugs?
I made out with a dude last night who has an ex wife. Is this what post grad life is about?
When I say "is it a bad idea to do Mollie before an 8hr shift tomorrow?" I dont want to hear the truth I want to hear you encouraging my bad decisions
Have fun in Vegas! Be safe, use condoms, and take a pic of Jon beforehand to give out when he goes missing. It will help the police.
So that guy from plenty of fish has a lightning bolt tattooed on his face. I kinda feel like I HAVE to sleep with him now.
Looks like it rained condoms in my room last night
I forgot to bring soap and all I could find here was body wash. It's like bathing with laundry detergent.
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