What happened?....
He lifted up the blanket, and whispered "Don't do it" to his sperm....
just heard someone say they saw a guy puke while riding a bike across campus without stopping
We were making out and then he stopped and said to me, "Your ship is right there, why don't you take your people and just go?"
Improvement. She went from pretending she was the soccer ball in the world cup games and it hurt when they kicked her to passed out on the floor.
I came home to burning cookies and him outside "tanning" naked.
He just wants an even tan
i literally paused in the middle of it, turned on my light, pointed to the picture netxt to my bed and go "you hooked up with my roommate too!!! AWWW!" he was so weirded out. i don't think he understands the relationship we have..we share..
Its only.eleven and we are already chasing a man on a bike with a bag full of burger king
So I had a crappy evening so the fat girl in me says eat and cry and watch something sad. The cool girl in me says don't eat go run. So I'm watching family guy and doing crunches w a pickle in my mouth
Gross
AN ACTUAL PICKLE
googling pictures of Lindsey Lohan so that I know what to wear to court is definitely a low point in my life
That guy drinking savagely was actually at his buddy's gay bachelor party in the male stripper section. He came over to the chicks side so we drank with him.
He had some sort of penis-related post traumatic stress disorder, but body shots seemed to wake him up
My whole sorority girl exterior is just a lie. I'm a fat tumblr girl on the inside.
Also, it was so cold in that bathroom that I saw my crap steaming, a first in my life
Would you accept a fantastic blowjob as payment?
I remember the Prince Albert and the three penises in the threesome. But the rest no.
I’m glad they have a happy marriage but why do they have to inflict it on the rest of us?
Randomize
