Nice 2 c u showing ur bro some affection
I think, one-on-one, Paul Rudd could be very threatening in like a REALLY good way.
Nhdgh I love you very much hello becausevs. Vagina pensiono
I mean, there was frosting being put on a tunafish sandwich. Pretty sure she knew we were high.
I just found your spare underwear and the half eaten granola bar you left in my purse.
Bro, I just want to tell you that I'm glad you got fired. I'm going to fuck your replacement.
i should teach a seminar on how to fall off the wagon
Maybe STDs were invented to keep stupid people from having kids.
Apparently we were just playing "bang a bridesmaid". I'm not sure if I won or lost...
We poured some Korbel out for our homie Dick Clark.
He gave me a box of cheez-its after sex, does that make me a hooker?
Vomit your little heart out. You've got a long day tomorrow
As a member of the kink community, I feel grossly misrepresented
So I woke up this morning to find my laptop open, with a google search for "where to buy marble", and a hungover naked northern girl in my bed who told me that I claimed to be a sculptor last night and that I promised to sculpt a bust of her hands...
Please come pick up your twin. She's tap dancing in her underwear and that's not how you want yourself represented.
Randomize
