I think we should urban dictionary "drive of shame." It involves a sprint to your car in his underwear and shirt, surreptitiously trying to put on your bra on at stoplights without attracting attention from neighboring cars, and lurking in your car a block from home so you can know when your roommate leaves for work.
I'd do that. But we would need storm trooper helmets.
There are babies in the room i shouldnt be high with babies in the room.
Law school is ruining my masturbation schedule.
you woulda been proud of me tonight though. i only made out with 2 guys. and in my defense one of them was to get a job after graduation.
We're in ER. He's high on morphine and I'm drunk. Gonna score some bed pans for jello shots.
Happy meals everywhere. I think Ronald McDonald Claus visited.
Something bad happened. I'm just giving you some notice. So you can smoke some pot and hide all sharp items in the house.
I peppersprayed myself last night. Sigh.
Itd be nice if there was a level of interest in me somewhere in between the indifference and obsession that I've only been attracting
She literally took off her shirt and ran out of the bar. When she ran back she smashed into the glass door with her face....That's got to be the best way to celebrate your 30th.
How does one un superglue their foot to the floor
Right now you and beer are my only friends.
Knowing there are different types of spiders in different countries and regions makes me never want to travel.
Dude I turned down free booze. I think I'm growing as a person.
Randomize
