ARI BLEW A 2.0 HAHAHAHAHAHHAHH THESE COPS ARE SO COOL!!!!
I am spending my child support on dildos
we just stared at taco bell's menu on the website for 2 hours
I was sleeping on the bathroom floor and thought a wet towel might keep me warm.
He suggested abortion before I finished the sentence. That was my plan too, but now I feel like should keep it just to prove how big of a dick he is.
you came home soaking wet, and when I asked where your umbrella was, you pulled it out of your bag and were so proud you kept it dry.
at 6am he came into my room and kicked me in the stomach. when i finally got up he was passed out in my hallway and the bathtub water was running
She passed out in his mom's bed and when we went to go get her she went 'no its cool I live here'.
Don't lose. A little bit of my soul dies every time a beer pong game is lost.
I think I might be drunk enough to cut my own hair
he was cumming and all I could think about was the pathway of sperm the in penis. thanks a lot nursing
Can't talk right now. I'm doing tequila shots with my professor at some Mexican bar. That's how I prepare for finals.
As he was going down on me, I looked over his shoulder and said "ohh a Christian mingle commercial is on"
Who wakes up at 9 and says "let me send a pic of my dick to my ex gf"
Did you mark a random day on my calendar as National Seth Day?
Sounds like a legit day to me.
Randomize
