her boyfriend dumped her for my exgirlfriend. so filming our hookup is pretty much a definite.
He got 20 stiches.. Who knew so much damage could come from a single shopping cart.
Needless to say they were not happy to find out that we braided their hair together, when one of them woke up needing to puke bad
I'm also glad were at the point in our friendship where my vagina talking to you isn't weird
why did I try to FaceTime with 311 last night?
Way to high for badminton right now. This is gonna be a shitshow.
I'm doing somethin that's never been done before...the 10 am booty call come over
Free tacos and bad night are never used in the same sentence
I had to ask. I mean when you get a snap chat of a nipple you have to ask who's it is.
It was the hardest I ever came in my life and once I could see straight again I just looked at him and said "cool"
You seriously don't remember crying about how much you miss your mom right before we hooked up?
I'm not breaking up with him because his husky is having puppies.
I don't know if the fact that I carry lube in my purse means I'm living life right or I'm doing it wrong..
You don't get to call me bro after you've had your dick in me.
I didn’t spend $100 for a wax to sit here and listen to you FT your brother to complain about how bad the Jets are.
Randomize