I don't know what you were told but i for sure didn't sleep with any one but steve's couch.
you turned your livingroom into a bong?
We were driving to yogurt express by state and these girls mooned is while they passed us and we saw full vag complete with tampon string dangling.
Appropriately today was the first time I've ever GTL'd. I can't believe I made fun of this,it's rather relaxing.
Quick question: how long can sperm live in a rug?
why did you let me tell everyone that you can get herpes from the ice luge and then let me do the ice luge?
His wife found out about our affair the same day he got fired for it.
So the guy who is making our IDs is in jail now for attempted murder, with no bail...
So no fakes?
You told me my blanket felt like ground beef.
Fuck. I have to get my shit together by lunch. Mission impossible.
Yeah, I only wore tennis shoes under the gown. Way cooler than khakis and a shirt, but much more awkward when my parents wanted to go to dinner immediately after the ceremony and my grandmother started to unzip the gown. Stopped her before it was too late, but barely. My dad just rolled his eyes.
The best part of Easter was watching all his colorblind cousins try to find the eggs.
No other awkward car ride can beat the one you give your drug dealer home.
I was so high I could TASTE the fillings in my teeth
Some sorority went “Dick or Treating” at a frat house and now the Halloween parties are canceled
Randomize
