google image searching george stephanopoulos at 1 AM on a saturday night...once again
Jon and Kate. Drink everytime we see tears. Drink twice if a child cries. Finish your bev if you cry.
the #6 from wendy's when stoned is definitely better than sex. i dont care what anyone says.
at least you got your priorties in line. new years first, than the baby.
Your job is getting in the way of our day drinking. Shots on the hour are not as cool alone.
I just want you to know that I'm, like, 45% hard right now.
Yeah then she waddled like a duck in silence sat down and ate the entire paper towel roll.
No padding. I spent my whole summer with my nips out. October don't need that too.
That shot was terrible
You were like one of those guys at carnivals that spit out fire..... Except it was throw up
Btw "you gettin a workout in" isn't a great gym pickup line. Like no I'm fucking grabbing lunch on my way to class.
I have 2 voicemails from u last night. one of them is just 5 min of u saying "doodling"...
Potholders are an underrated garment. Especially naked.
Having to do the walk of shame on crutches was defiently a first for me. cheers to the governor, klove
But we made up last night and had unbelievably crazy sex tonight. I legit went blind for like 15mins from him choking me. It was awesome
I'm completely creeped out. He's dressed as me. And thinks it's funny.
Randomize
