it's business casual sex. like no kissing, shake hands after, occasional frequency
You said you were collecting Asians for your Kate Gosselin costume.
It is 8 o'clock in the morning and there is already blood all over one of the stalls in the bathroom. What has your St. Patrick's day done for you?
Do you think my bosses would frown upon Jameson with breakfast on this holiest of days?
First day at work... I clogged up the office toilet on purpose to assert my dominance.
And as far as being fat goes I just did like 20 minutes of p90x and now i'm eating frosting out of the container....
You went from loaded cattleman, to football player, to better football player, to art major from Missouri. Your future was looking so good for a while.
Im pretty sure it started going awry when I asked their mom "How much would it cost me to sleep with your daughters"
On my way to the DMV to get arrested
I just want to have such an intense orgasm that my heart stops and I die. I mean that would kind of suck for the guy I'm fucking but then again he could be like "I'm that good"
I have 7 papers to write and I already bought gas station ice cream in my pjs and questioned whether or not a beer float was a thing.
Now I just sit back and wait to give ass birth to pure evil.
A party without a piñata is not a party I want to attend.
I came and sneezed at the same time. Words can't describe how awesome it was.
i swear a herd of elephants who like to smoke weed lives directly above our room
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