Just found a picture of a hobo making out with her tits...a HOBO
i will be the first lesbian to ever fail women's studies.
I sent her 8 pictures of my dick in a baked potato. Not sure how I thought that would get me laid later.
Just saw a cougar do the walk of shame. She asked housekeeping where the fastest elevator was.
When I ask you to make sure no ones coming while I'm changing.. The logical friend would keep watch. But you my, best friend come stand in front of me and flash everybody.
I just used FaceTime as a look out while I got a blowjob in the library
Is this a drinking picnic?
Is there another kind?
So I had sex in the woods today. Anything else that happened today? Irrelevant. It was a GOOD day.
He wore the same cologne as my orthodontist so all I could think about was how I hadn't worn my retainer in months
I'm definitely not going to be able to fuck him high. I won't be able to not laugh at his man boobs
I need to reevaluate my stance on weekday hangovers...
I'm bleeding and have questions
Like he was cock blocking and it usually takes ten cocks to block this cock
it’s about to be september and all i keep thinking is what if i go (another) full calendar year without having sex?
Just peed on the front lawn of the capital building. Great American.
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