i think ur clone was at the club last week. she slapped some tall girl in the face who tried to steal her spot on the podium. i dont know if ur like her, but she seemd like a ninja badass with superpowers
so they made cookies with their faces printed on them...I ate jaime...she tasted like poop
So I've only had a mustache for about 5 minutes and I'm already pretty sure it's the best decision I've ever made.
A. What the fuck are period panties? B. Don't ever wear them around me... or bears.
did mom hear me barking???
oooooh yeah. good luck explaining that one
sooo high. sooo many dog friends
Wheres my essay?
You mean the vodka drenched shreds of paper taped all over the walls of the hallway?
I'm gonna drop in for a zip later man. It made me wanna eat my girls shampoo. Good shit
you regret 100% of the tequila shots you do take. thats what gretzky meant to say
I'm going as your incestuous sister. If thats not the perfect winglady I don't know what is.
I hope you get stoned and think that you're a seal in shark infested waters
Oh my god I'm in a public bathroom with a space heater. I never want to leave
My legs feel like baby dolphins
You're gonna be sprawled out basking in the sun working on your tan like a ridiculously hot iguana, and I'm gonna be here bundled up in about 72 layers just so I don't freeze my dick off looking like the Michelin man's gay cousin
i apologize, I may have called you an iguana
Mistakes were made
Still fucking the ballerina?
She can put her legs behind her head.
Enough said
Ok. Yes. He has a tiny penis. But he also has a trust fund.
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