dude sorry but u no that when a guys 'likes' ur pic on facebook it only means he was just jacking off to it.
I just found 17 dollars of saltine crackers in my room. confused incredibly. suprised not at all.
hot twin vs twin who's good in bed. why do my life choices same way unfair
Some great men died of syphilis. I accept your compliment.
My autobiography is now tentatively titled "I'm Fucking the DJ, and Other Ways to Party for Cheap"
He likes bondage and spanking and shit.
Oh, so "normal" kinky not "I wanna pee on people" kinky. I can handle that.
At a party. It smells like teen pregnancy and sadness in here.
I'm not really made for random hookups.. i'm like a swan.. i don't wanna have random swan sex. i just wanna have one swan hubby and fly around the world together and eat bread that people throw at us..
Well it's official... The first guy I ever gave head to now holds 2 world records. Should I text him asking if I can try and break my record?
I was convinced to buy a man thong.
But it's Armani so it's okay.
God I just out gayed myself.
I don't know if trying Molly for the first time before my flight was an awesome or aweful idea
After a roaring rendition of Jay-Z's "99 Problems but a bitch ain't one" I ended up making her cry on her birthday.
He's like a sexy bearded lumberjack who likes wine.. I can't lose..
he's figured out my code; what are you doing = I haven't found a better dick yet
Sorry about peeing on your phone last night
Randomize
