she has over 3,000 tagged photos on facebook. dont tell me she isnt annoying.
We'll cross that bridge when we come to it... Or burn it. Either way we'll deal with it later
No now hes going to beat me to our goal of getting someone to have sex in the library. I hate periods.
I don't know what to judge you more for.
A relator touring our house this week saw the picture in our bathroom of steven passed out, yellow faced, with BALLS on his forehead, and had to ask "if that kid was alive or dead".
the girl next to me in class is drinking a margarita out of a slurpee cup. i know your going to ask how i know its a margarita and the answer is i can smell the tequila. i never want to leave this place
She liked every single Facebook status in her newsfeed and then made her status 'I LIKE U GUYS'
keep an eye on me. i'm afraid that after a few more drinks i'll ask to borrow his wheelchair.
I shouldn't have to thank you for taking off your captain hat off before we had sex
you know you made out with my sister while holding Ur girlfriends hand while she was puking in the toilet right
i want to pour hot gravy all over you in bed
I wonder if a fish could survive in vodka
I could
I just fucked her in the corner of an ally while holding a large pizza waiting on a pledge for a ride.
Tell me again why we had to Facebook stalk your therapist?
This girl was in the river screaming that someone didn't love her anymore...that's when the guy in a kilt claimed her...
Found your bra in my backseat. And yes it took me that long to finally clean it out from last weekend
Didn't even know it was missing, if that makes you feel any better
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