I solve my problems like an adult, at the strip club drinking on a work night.
I just found out my favorite drunk show, Repo Men, is just reenactments. I can't express through words my disappointment.
he started drinking at 9am with grey goose and pancakes. He IS my hero.
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
Hey to make you feel better about last night, I just shit my pants.
If you don't sing me a lullaby then I'll just take shots till I pass out
Eric and I just went in the hallway to practice our new handshake in a real life situation at live speeds. That high.
I call BS on that! THAT WAS TOTALLY AN INTERCEPTION. JENNINGS HAD THAT.
PEOPLE ARE FLIPPING FURNITURE HERE. IN THE ROOM ABOVE ME. I HEARD SOMEONE WOOKIE CALL IN ANGER FROM SOMEWHERE IN THIS BUILDING.
I'd be lying if I said I wasn't scared, even a little.
I'm running on two hours of sleep, a shot of vodka, and half of a granola bar. I can't be held responsible for what I do.
ok NEVER tell the strippers its your birthday. i think i have to burn these clothes and take a bath in bleach
I'm gonna guess ur still high cus last night at like 3am my pillows were morphing into cats and I kept trying to pet them
So is the trick to long distance communication to be drunk during phone conversations?
He must be a special kind of stupid to cheat on a women who works at a funeral home. Does he not understand you can get rid of dead bodies easier than most Americans?
Not entirely sure how I got drunk off 2 mimosas but here I am
I'm waiting for you in a manthong right now.
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