I just got a ticket for shitting on a sand dune.
ohhh my god. this party should be titled "my hookups of summers past" be expecting some good stories tomorrow
You gave him head? He fingered you? A little bit of make out?
WHAT THE FUCK ITS LIKE YOU WERE THERE
Life is so much better after having sex.
Her dress is practically falling off. It must know I'm here.
He said that if more girls show up hes not going to ask ages... Spoken like a true sex offender
IS FOOTBALL GONNA SUCK HIS DICK? NO, IT IS NOT
Slurping strawberries throug a straw. It feels like the kool-aid man is coming in my mouth.
Either I'm still drunk or the right side of the bed is now the left side.
I swear I can't go out anymore. It's like he put a GPS in my dick. I don't know if I should feel awkward or proud...
Last night I dressed up as a cowgirl and walked into McDonald's. I bought 20 mcribs. There's pictures
Well don't pass out under a Swedish flag and people won't make assumptions
WHERE THE FUCK IS MY ARM DO YOU HAVE ANY IDEA HOW DIFFICULT IS IS TO TYPE WITH ONE HAND
Ive got small boobs, but they sure do like to pop out and party with the big dogs.
We're going through the drive-through at mcdonalds while pulling sam behind us in the wheelchair and having them hand him the food. Let me know how this went in the morning
Randomize