i just drank a strangers drink off a toilet
It's just like the Real World with babies
I miss vodka workout Fridays
You screamed for campus security to do something about the police officer who dumping ur 40
he told me not to treat him like a child and then started peeing off the trampoline
oh, you know. just sitting in my bed high as fuck wearing a windbreaker and watching british tv.
It's all good. The CSI guy came and I played the theme song while he in was in our place. The cops even laughed.
I guarantee that wasn't the first penis someone placed on her forehead.
We were in the hot tub...he ate the pizza pocket directly out of my mouth
The number of males in the usa getting circumsized are decreasing. Keep this in mind when we become cougars
Just to an Octoberfest and a sex party. Nothing wild.
Come to Des Moines on Saturday, handcuff yourself to me and drink a bottle of vodka
If I don't get to have sex with him soon my entire female reproductive system is gonna climb out of my body and choke me to death
Rage-masturbating and then crying myself to sleep. Welcome to Wednesday.
i have pictures frm only 4 hours ago that will fucking ruin you so i suggest yuo come get me.
Where are you?
dunno. ask mike. bring pain killers. and underwear. and my dignity.
Randomize
