When my kids ask how I lost my virginity Im going to have to tell them of a mythical thing called "Myspace" and how strangers could lure you into their "den of love" thanks to clever quotes and graphics
i just had sex with a fat kid who giggles when he cums. tequila really lowers my standards.
told my boyfriend i was a virgin so he wouldnt feel bad since he is. now hes asking why his dick is so itchy. should i tell him why?
i don't see why you should, it's not like you told the other guys with the itchy dicks.
She gives pretty bad head, but when it's in her dad's Lexus SUV it's tough to complain.
We should celebrate the resignation of Berlusconi tonight with too many bottles of wine and sambuca. We're allies, right?
Dude you were so high some kid was kicking the wall and you were convinced it was your heartbeat
Remember the 3 things that are off limits? They're fair game if you get here in the next 5 minutes
hahahaha what do we need the kangaroos for? please tell me we release them instead of doves
I think I caught your cold through my vagina. It was worth it.
I should become her mentor. Get her life back together for her
You mean sponsor?
I can recall having this conversation with a three year old, but go on
listen i get youre a daddy dom but that doesnt give you a pass to make dad jokes
Dignity. Ruined. Must. Smoke. Weed.
Ya, It's probably because whenever I close my eyes I see a kitten playing a banjo.
Dude it's unhealthy how much I love vagina in my face
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