Gte hit a new low, I took a poopnap, passed out mid poop on the toilet.
They threw a beer at you on stage and then you stopped the karaoke and cussed everyone in the bar out for 2 minutes
she refused to get out of the dog cage till we sang "be our guest" to her.
Apperanlty I was screaming "It's hard to swim with a broken ankle sir" and then tackled the lifeguard. The joys of blackouts
Her mom is home on her lunch break. Guess who's hiding In the Closet?
I already banned bobbing for apples. While drunk that's just drowning near fruit.
Just helped a homeless man panhandle outside of Wawa, made him $6.31. Where are you?
...im seriously confused as to why this doesn't make sense to you. Girl hostage, rob casino. Makes perfect sense.
Using our apartments online floor/space planner to see how many beer pong tables we can fit. Dont think they had this in mind when they put this thing online.
Probably not lol but were fitting as many as possible
If I'm going to start compromising my butthole it's going to be for much better drugs than a ventolin
Some poor guy found you passed out in a bathroom stall. Again with your dick out. Looks like you got to rage after all.
Winning pick four numbers were just 6969... if I were 18 I could've won 20,000 dollars.
They just broke the window so they could get in and smoke the taxi driver out...
Did I see you at the bar last night?
Yes. You just kept grabbing my boobs and saying how much better they are than yours...
it was weird i started the party in just my underwear and woke up in my clothes
Randomize
