is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
guess who just spent driver's ed figuring out how to draw a guy giving head
Someone wrote that you're a whore in one of the bathroom stalls
I didn't know I was popular enough to be hated. This is awesome
yes, too bad my tears were being wiped away by tits in my face
i feel like im doing the pre-walk of shame..like every car that drives by is like, ooooo look at that girl, in that itty bitty dress, yep shes about to get her skank on tonight...
I've been at work for less than an hour and have pooped twice already. That's what happens when you start sleeping with your roommate and don't want to use the bathroom at home anymore.
soooo we both peed the bed last night...
i just realized why god gave us younger siblings....to DD for us when we come home for the summers
Just had a serious bathroom emergency at walmart a and it appears that i ate a taco bell burrito wrapper last night
So did u puke in his bathroom or all over his Olympic medals? Please say medals...
My girlfriend is studying for the MCAT by watching The Magic Schoolbus. There go my dreams of being a househusband.
I just woke up tangled in fishing line while wearing someone else's bathing suit with fishes drawn all over me. What kind of sex did we have?
I have a knack for carnage and poetic language.
I went to the hospital to have my arm checked out, and they already knew the story. They gave me props for posting photos on facebook before even coming to the hospital.
I tried to fuck you in my bathroom while my parents were in the next room. I am a clusterfuck of fun.
Randomize
