does he have a tent? the camping kind not the boner kind.
you were the other women for BOTH people in the relationship?
I was so hungover I threw up on her when she answered the door. i don't think it was a good first impression
biggest mistake ever: halloween 2009
you kept spraying the cat with water and then telling it to "man up" when it cried
my way of studying for our final tomorrow: registering online to retake the class in the fall
I pulled my tongue muscle last night. your welcome.
He was very impressed that you could put your hair in a ponytail by yourself while throwing up.
I demand visitation hours with the duck.
I consider myself to be an upstream bisexual
You're the salmon of the gays...
I cut myself stripping on your car. Probably a profession I shouldn't pursue
Sorry about the picture of wills balls via snapchat last night btw
Nothing. Its like my body doesn't know how to function on a Saturday when its not hungover and/or still drunk.
We got caught fucking on the couch while I was in my Godzilla onesie.
I just walked in on my dad beating it.. There's not a fucking therapist in ARKANSAS that can help me with that!
Randomize
