This may sound mean but have u ever just sat in class and look at some of the the people and think how disappointed their parents must be
i'm 6 minutes and 3 drinks deep before she gets here. she's do-able for a wednesday night, but i still need to mentally prepare, ya know?
Well if I am having twins, at least I'll finally have 2 kids by the same father.
i literally paused in the middle of it, turned on my light, pointed to the picture netxt to my bed and go "you hooked up with my roommate too!!! AWWW!" he was so weirded out. i don't think he understands the relationship we have..we share..
she asked me if i can do her a favor, came over, and gave me head then left. i still dont understand how that was a favor for her.
when we got back we had sex. but it wasnt til the morning that i figured out her leg was broken
It's all sex hats and vagina bandages with you isn't it?
So I'm sitting at my desk and Thunderstruck came on my iPod. I then proceeded to drink coffee every time I heard thunderstruck. Who says you don't remember anything from college?
I had very briefly met him a few years ago. My friend was tired of hearing us both complain about being horny. She figured she would fuck two birds with one stone.
He said I was doing well, so I stopped mid blow job to compliment his grammar. You could say I like intellectuals
Yeah, first date. First take a pic of him to circulate around for your friends and than have him fill out a short penis questionnaire. Seems completely legit to me.
I get a little bitchy. We all know that
Like I don't care that he's a drug dealer, but I have a problem with his inefficient and ineffective business model.
It's just not St. Patrick's Day until someone pukes on your panties.
I think I'm dead. Also I think I stole $20 from a stripper.
You did. Then gave it to me.
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