Prereq for being on nyc prep: money, bitchy, and a lazy eye... if only you were rich
Does boxed wine and camel crushes signify a college date? Lets hope so
new hobby: convincing random sorority girls around campus that we hooked up last weekend. i'm 2 for 5.
I'm not making any promises. But if I start throwing food at you, just go with it.
I wish you would stop telling everyone that your cock turned me into a Bears fan.
I was tied up in bed before noon, the rest of the day can go to hell.
Archery is over so let's go back to not giving a fuck for the next 3 years and 11 months
Your ankle brace is here and the saw is charged. Grab some vodka that cast is coming off tonight.
i'm teaching a bunch of people how to grow weed over snapchat. no shame.
I want to show up to tomorrow's study group looking like I got hit by a train. A train made of dicks.
I've just been thinking about sangria a lot lately, like an adult.
If that orgasm indicates how the rest of the year is going to go, I need to buy rain boots.
I'd just like to inform you. That when I was at bvj the first day I was blackout drunk by noon. Get on past Chelsea's level like now. Do it for present Chelsea
she grabed my junk and started making lightsaber noises
I wonder if you could get her in a metal bikini
Woke up with a $100 bill from the Philippines in my bra & an unopened box of sour patch kids next to me. I have some questions.
Randomize
