I'm fucking your sister right now.
You motherfucker
She's next.
Do you know my vagina holds 14 pints of water?
UD be completely fine. you don't lose control just keep a positive environment. for example i really want to lick the wall cause red is delicious but i don't have to.
The amount of pregnancy tests I've taken in my life is unhealthy
my goal is to not remember how i make a living by 9pm saturday night
We are probably going to have to use your boobs as currency to get this done
My dad got me a charm braclet....his way of trying to support my gayness....
Tommarow we shall sacrifice the freshmen to the sun god
Where the fuck do you get consience sedatives from?
Helped a guy at work today that did nothing but stare at my chest....safe to say the Girls were looking G.O.O.D. today.
Does she know she is talking to people who slam shots of fireball and chase it with vodka?
If you don't come home and fuck me soon I'm walking over there naked and dragging you home by your penis
Jamie's fucking a senior citizen and I'm eating chips and salsa in the shower at 2am, so whatever you're doing it can't be worse.
woke up with 8 used magnum condoms bound together by floss around my neck, thats about all im gonna tell you.
He started out in my roommates bed and by the end of the night was in mine, not sure how that went down. But he left happy in the morning.
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