dude you have to find out what a girl's name is before you sleep with her. if her name is debbie she's boring, if her name is lauren she's an overrated hoebag, if her name is meagan she gived bad head.
may or may not have recieved head in the car before we came in.
First straight guy ever blown in a Prius. Congrats.
Well at one point you put icyhot on your feet because you lost your shoes and it was snowing outside.
My body isn't even mad at me...just disappointed
my dad is going to jail this weekend
where are we going to get our weed from?
No i dont need Magnum Condoms, that would be like putting MC Hammer pants on my dick
I'm officially "accidentally set myself on fire" drunk
You guys seriously fuck to bieber? That's embarrassing...
Agreed. And i highly doubt it could be awkward. You do remember our introduction was a direct result of you mentioning your affinity for my genitals, right?
They're showing aladdin at the bar my birthday is complete
Correction... Drunk on winter break. There are no days of the week on break.
Guess I was throwing darts at a patrons head last night, lol! Black out
definitely good. no good can come from sex in a very full public venue.
I had to say goodbye to one of my fuck buddies last night. He's voting for Trump, we shouldn't be doing it anyways.
Dude we just exchanged Zelda related pickup lines. I fell in love at "you can blow on my ocarina"
Randomize
